To begin, set a timer. A few minutes is fine for starting.

Sit up straight in a firm chair, or cross-legged on a meditation cushion, or take some other comfortable, but not too comfortable, position.

Wear loose-fitting clothes if cross-legged. The idea with the cushion is for your knees to be lower than your hips, so that your feet are less likely to fall asleep.

Take a breath and straighten your back tall as though you had a string pulling up through the top of your head. Bring your hands to rest on your thighs. As you breath out, relax comfortably into this position, as though your vertebrae were stacking gently one on top of the other.

Your position is not something you have to get “just right.” Be comfortable and gentle with yourself.

Rest your eyes on the floor or wall in front of you, slightly lowered, or close them.

Begin to meditate.

Start by paying attention to your breath. Notice what it feels like coming through your nose, filling your lungs, and then going out through either your nose or mouth.

Your mind will inevitably start moving in different directions, that is what a mind does.

Each time you become aware of your thoughts, whether you notice yourself worrying, planning, remembering, or daydreaming, just acknowledge the thought: “There’s planning.”

Then allow your attention to come back to the present moment. It can help to return your attention to your breath. You can also turn your attention to what you observe through your senses. Notice the temperature of the room, the sound of cars passing, or the fact that you are sitting and meditating. There is nothing going on here but this stillness.

If you find yourself feeling an emotion – sadness, anger, anxiety, joy – acknowledge it. Take a moment to be curious about what it feels like and where it came from. Then come back to what you observe through your senses.

If you find yourself feeling an ache or an itch, do not tend to it immediately. Take a moment to be curious about it, what does it feel like? If it persists, feel free to shift and tend to it. Another meditation instructor might advise you to leave it be entirely, and it can be fruitful to try this, but it is not my practice to sit with pain for a long time.

If your mind is busy like a ping pong match, or what is sometimes called “monkey mind,” all the more opportunity for you to practice acknowledging your thoughts and then coming back to the present moment. That is meditation. Noticing, coming back to the present moment. Again.

The goal is not to have a blank mind, but rather to not “get hooked” by your thoughts – planning, worrying, remembering, or daydreaming – by following them wherever they want to go.

If you wish, you can imagine placing each thought on a leaf and letting it float down a stream, or letting them drop beside you like footballs that you do not catch. However such metaphors do not need to be a part of your practice.

When you extend your meditation practice to longer periods of time, you may find one or both of your feet falling asleep. In this case, it can be helpful to include a period of walking meditation. For example, 10 minutes sitting, 10 minutes walking, 10 minutes sitting.

When walking, you can pay attention to the feeling of your feet on the ground.

It can be helpful in the beginning to follow recorded meditations, such as a meditation course that lasts between 7-30 days, with a new recording to follow each day. This can help you to establish a routine.

Guided meditations can often be inspiring and explore different ways to think about the self and life. You may find that after a while you prefer to meditate in silence.

You may also want to join a meditation group if there is one available in your community. Maybe you will practice most days on your own for just a few minutes or an hour, and then once a week with a community group. It can be particularly nourishing to meditate with others, in a dedicated space.

People who have a meditation practice may find that on days that they sit, they feel more grounded, more calm, and more connected. If you don’t feel any of those things, you’re still meditating. When the thought comes up “I’m not doing this right,” just acknowledge it, and come back to the present moment.

By taking this time to be still in your body and observe your thoughts without following them, you will become more familiar with what it feels like to let your parasympathetic nervous system do its calming work. You will then be more likely to find that calm again during the more active parts of your day, when you are making decisions, relating to others, and meeting challenges. You will know what it is like to step back from roiling thoughts and feelings and acknowledge them, so that you can then check in with your own values about what you want to do next. Pema Chodron put it best, “You are the sky. Everything else – it’s just the weather.” But on days when this is really difficult to see, just acknowledge that too.

There are many resources for learning how to meditate. Apps like Calm, Headspace and Breethe, well known instructors and writers like Pema Chodron, Tara Brach, and Jon Kabat Zinn. You can try these or get started on your own.